Why?  So many whys out there floating in my head.  Why did you have to change?  Where you that way the whole time?  I remember laying with you and crying tears of happiness.. at the very beginning.  Because I was so in love.   We had so much... and it was all lost...   I have been so strong.. maybe thats why I need this cry right now.  Another part of me being released.  I can't help but feel stupid for being sad right now.  I have amazing people in my life who I love dearly, and a very sweet man who treats me great.  So why?  Why does it hurt?  I dont cry for him.  I cry for the love that I had felt that is gone.  I hope I feel it again someday and I hope that these moments are even more few and far between than they've come.  Tomorrow would have been our 9 year wedding anniversary.  And while I'm not "celebrating it" it just is the one day a year that was ours.  I dont know how to feel.  Just keep feeling stupid and sad.  Angie feels stupid and sad.  A.S.S  yep thats me